LAST DAY OF THE DECADE AND 2019

WOW!!! It is the last day of the decade!!! Where has the time gone. I always think that... but it has really gone by so fast.

As I sit here on New Years eve and reflect on the year gone, I do feel very grateful and blessed. I have personally come really far and am really proud of all that I have gone through and the strength that I gained as I end this decade.

My wish is for the next year to even be better and it will be. I still need to grow a lot and do a lot. I feel as we end the decade and start a new one, I will strategically plan out my short and long term plan. 

I am also really proud of having my 2 babies this last decade and the greatest honor of being their mom. What a great way to end the decade as my oldest completed his first decade and my daughter turns 8 in a few weeks. A proud mama indeed.

I was thinking about all the things I did do this past decade and all the ones I missed out on. One of the other big things was buying the house we currently live in. I love this out and have found my quietest times alone in the mornings sipping my tea sitting out on my front porch. 

There are so many moments I can remember and some I would like to forget but one of the most important findings was my own heart and self-acceptance. I found my way and although I am no where close to being done, I have at least begun the journey and it starts with the end of this decade to the birth of a new one.

I loved the past 10 years, marked with so many happy moments. I would like to end the year remembering the good moments and all the areas that I grew rather than focusing on the not so good ones. Even the not so good experiences were learning opportunities and as long as I have learned the lesson, I can live with my not so good actions and behaviors. 

My wish for the new year is to do an even job at loving myself and working on self acceptance even more, especially on the days when I don't really feel it. Being more introspective and recognizing my feelings, emotions and acting accordingly will always be a challenge. I wish I can stay in the happy, do and say everything right state all the time and every single day but that is probably unrealistic since I am a human with tons of emotions!!

I have decided to come up with a word or a mantra every month to help me along this year. I think it will help me stick to my goals better and hold myself accountable. I am not sure what I will start with for next month but something to definitely think about.

One of the other things I want to work on is spending more one on one time with my kids. I did not do a very good job this year and hope to do a better job next year. Other than just, just focusing on building more experiences will be key for me. I want to travel a lot more, and spend on things that are of real value to me like building memories. 

As I get older my priorities change and this year is no different. I certainly don't want to look back at 2020 as another year where all my dreams were yet again unfulfilled due to my fear or me just holding back because of some reason that my mind came up with. 

Life is short and the years do go by fast so live life lovingly and move forward to the next year with all your might!! It will be a great one.

Wishing you peace and love my friends!

Peace,
Monita

ITS THAT TIME OF THE YEAR

Ah...the holidays!!! I love them!! It is the most wonderful time of the year and one of my favorite times of the year.

It seems so magical and wonderful and everyone is in such a good mood. Some of us get stressed due to families visiting and others perhaps feel differently. Either ways, I hope that your holidays are enjoyable and you get the time to just be fully present with family and friends and just savor the moment and take it all in.

I heard a saying that "Christmas is a state of mind". Our lives are the way our state of mind is. I wish people left their decorations all year round. I love seeing all the colors and lights..reminds me of keeping that mental picture in my mind always since before you know it will be over and we will be back to the normal grind.

What if we can somehow carry that state of mind with us into the new year and beyond? What if I just bring my mind back to this time of the year whenever I am feeling stressed or down? There is always a possibility to renew and remember the magical moments of the holidays and bring a little cheer and smile to our faces. I can really just imagine when I am feeling the winter blues to bring myself to the magical lights and say well this winter too shall pass and before we know it, spring will sprung on us.

Everything is a state of mind. It is really in how you think about it. I can stay bitter about how cold it is and all the Christmas magic around me is over or I can just enjoy the season and I chose the latter. There is not point in thinking otherwise since I have a choice to control my state of mind. The hard part is always remembering that you do have a choice. 

It is that time of the year and the most wonderful time of the year. I love the holidays and my wish is that we take the time to wish everyone you know and see. Bring a little cheer to strangers since you may never know how that one smile and wish can make a difference to their day.

Keep smiling and make the most of it!! Be in that state of mind and cherish the time. Find a way to carry that forward to the new year so when we begin the year, we carry the wonder of the holidays. If the holidays have brought some unexpected event or news and you are not feeling it, I still wish you peace, prayers, love and support no matter where you are. 

Wishing you peace and love my friends from my heart to yours. Happy Holidays!!

Peace,
Monita

I HAVE HAD IT

Hello my friends!!! Its really early Saturday morning and I am enjoying having this time to write and reflect. I can't believe Thanksgiving is next week. Time really does go by so fast and I am looking forward to some downtime next week to be with family and friends and really enjoying the holiday.

Don't we all have those days, more often than not, to just be done for the day. Looking forward to the holidays has given me such joy since I have been having more frequent "I have had it" type of days. I mean the really rough, everything can go wrong, overwhelming type of day where you just want to quit your job.

It can get to be too much and when you are in that mode for a good stretch of time, it gets to be even harder to stay motivated. No one wants to go home after a day of work with the constant overwhelmed feeling but it happens and far too often with me lately.

So the question then becomes how do you deal with it? How can I pass through the overwhelm feeling and just chill when I come home and be present for my kids? Do I really want to continue to have this just throw my hands in feeling every day?

If it is a cycle of ups and down then at least I know that it is temporary and can convince myself by saying "this too shall pass". At first,  I did think that it was just going to be a little crazy for a short period of time, but its been going on since the last 60 days. There's been no downtime and just a constant putting out the fire type of drill which has been a lot to deal with and when you are new, it makes it harder. 

 Every company has their ups and downs, however, I think management can be a little more proactive and efficient. I am in a situation where I am dealing with management who really aren't giving things like deadlines and workload a thought and not learning any lessons. It almost feels like they want to work you non stop 7 days a week and during the holidays!!!

I find myself saying "I have had it" every single day multiple times a day. So I know that you can't just quit (at least I can't) and walk out. As I think about ways to deal with this overwhelm feeling I have come up with a few questions to ask myself:

• Can I quit right now? Yes or No.
• If it is a No, what can I do to help myself through the day to combat the feeling.
• What can I do more often before I start work, during work and after work to give me the happy feeling?
• What can I look forward to?
• What am I grateful for?
• What are the things that I can control?
• How can I keep one of my mantra"this too shall pass" front and center.

I know that I can't quit my job. To help myself through the day, I remember to take frequent breaks and walk away. I will need to do this more often and just leave my desk and walk around the floor or go downstairs, If possible, I like to just step outside even if it is just for 3 minutes to help me reset.

In order to do this more often, I need to do take deep breathes before work, during and after and constantly remind myself to take those breaks. If I stay seated for too long it becomes to much and at the end leaves me with the "I am so done" mode.

I look forward to going home and hugging my babies and just thinking about them at work washes away my overwhelming feeling and gives me a sense of calm right away. I am so grateful for them and everyone in my life .

I can't control what happens at work, or my manager, or other people or when I will get my dream job (I know there is no such thing). I can control my thoughts, my internal compass and guide it along the way.

I need to keep reciting "this too shall pass" everyday, every hour or minute. Sometimes I forget and I think writing it down on my pink post it note will be so helpful to look at. And while I can't control the work or anything else that happens at work,  I can control my reaction to it so I don't get stuck in the "fed up mode" with this job.

It is hard to stay in this mode for a long time since I find that it is taking a toll on my health. Being on the high stress highway for too long is causing a few health issues and I know that if I don't find a way to combat the stress, it will get worse. 

Keeping up with my exercises is probably one of the most important things I can do for myself. I try to workout at least 30 minutes everyday and it does wonders for me. Living a wholly life means to completely accept where I am for now, and find a way to push through till I can find something better and even then there is no guarantee that the grass will be greener on the other side. Doing the things that are within my control is what I can do and get better at. Its trying to live with that maybe this is all part of a plan for lessons I still need to learn. 

So while I have many, many days of I have had it and wanna quit, I can't and won't till I find something else. But remembering "this too shall pass" will get me through it. You can do this!!!

Wishing you love and Peace my friends!

Peace,
Monita

BEING THANKFUL FOR WHATS YET TO COME

Happy Sunday you all!!! It is a 3 day weekend so the kids are really excited about being able to sleep in tomorrow. I need to go to work since it is not a holiday for me so will miss spending the day with them. I always make sure to keep Sundays completely free and spend the time this valuable time together as a family. 

During my morning reflection today, I realized how important it is for me to continuously express my gratitude for all the things that I have in my life. I keep a gratitude journal and I try to write a few things that I am grateful for everyday if I can. I noticed how writing it down helps me to remember to have the attitude of gratitude. 

I recently read in a book once that in addition to having gratitude everyday, a very good practice is also to be thankful for the things that are yet to come. The author described it as a way to attract the things that you want. I thought it was a very interesting concept. I was not sure about the ability to attract by being thankful as if you already have it. 

I guess it was in a way describing the feeling of really wanting something deeply and by being grateful for it, it changes your thoughts. For me, I took it as one would feel more motivated to go after the future thing that are thankful for. 

I felt really good when I read that and I somehow can't seem to remember where I read it first. I have since read about the same concept in a couple of other books as well and decided that I am going to give it a try. 

So now, I not only am grateful for the things that happen in a day but also for the things that are yet to come to me. For example, I wrote I am thankful for the wondering job opportunity coming my way soon. As I am now writing and thinking about this a little more, I realized that being specific really helps rather then just writing a wonderful job opportunity. In order for me to really feel the gratitude, I need to get some detail about the wonderful job opportunity and what that means. Actually I may not get all the things that I want so focusing in on the top most important thing, like working from home a couple days a week, will be a start. 

I do think that it is a great way to feel optimistic about life. You may not have everything that you would like right now, but knowing that and being thankful for it to come to you some day really pushes me and gives me hope. If I am half-hearted about it, it would not come to me. I have to be full in and really feel the gratitude in my bones. 

My initial thought was also what if I am setting my expectations to high and hoping for something that will not come to me. Will I be disappointed that I was all this time being grateful for nothing? No...... it never goes to waste.

When I start being thankful for all the things that are yet to come to my life, the push that I feel is real. Rather than feeling stuck in some situations, I find that I start to think about the ways that I can really move forwards. I may not have the solution or I may not have the thing that I want right away but it forces me to stop the doubts that are in my mind. 

Doubting that my dreams will come true will only make it go away. If I am thankful that one day I will get it, I feel like I have surrendered my request to the universe. I am still going to do my part and have a plan but I don't need to know if I will ever receive it. I can only do my part and what is mean't to be will be.

Being in gratitude for the things that are yet to come helps me in some way to stay in faith and not loose hope. I still have a lot of work to do on myself to firmly plant the roots of my faith deep in the ground and hopefully feeling and living a life of gratitude will make the roots deeper.

So from here on out, I will be thankful for the all the things that are coming my way. I may not see them and I may not get everything, but I will always be thankful for the past, present and future.

Wish you love and peace my friends!

Peace,


Monita

FIRST TWO WEEKS AT MY NEW JOB

Good Morning my friends! It's Sunday. My kids are still asleep and I have been up since 4:45am. I am an early riser even on the weekends and I love it. I do get a lot of me time before they wake up and really make use of it. Most of the time, a lot of good thoughts come to my mind and I try to remember them throughout the day. 

I just completed my second week at my new job. So how did it all go? In short, its been quite an adjustment. Can't really say how things will go but my gut is telling me that this will not work out for the long run. I had a rough first week with lots of technical difficulties just to get set up. I also did not realize that the company does not provide any coffee/tea or supplies so I had to find a way to get set up with the things that I needed. I only have a couple of other members on the team and sit in an enclosed area that is absolutely freezing. 

So I know that the issues are really no big deal and I can really figure it out. The biggest thing that I experienced was resistance. I felt this feeling of not wanting to be there and was resistant. I had to force myself to pay attention and to stay focused and I had an achy feeling. It almost reminded me of how I felt every single day during the last year of my old job. 

Part of the reason is that I can see this job becoming very monotonous. It will be the same thing every single day and month. Once I learn it and get comfortable, there is really nothing exciting about it. I noticed that if I am really not interested in having a monotonous job. There could be other things that come up but more the most part, its really the same thing day in and day out. Most peoples job are that way but I am really not interested in the work itself. 

I think in short, I have not been feeling excited about it. The great thing about the new job is my commute. I am so close to home. I actually feel good about earning again and being in the situation that I am in. Nurturing my heart and soul is really about following my deepest desires and while this does provide with the paycheck, it does not nurture my soul in anyway. That's where the writing in this blog comes in. 

Keeping that perspective in mind, I know that the job will be bearable for now. The other bigger issue is that there is no telecommuting allowed which is a big no for me. I need that option to be able to telecommute at least once a week and not having that option really makes it even harder and creates more resistance for me. 

So what am I going to do? Well firstly, I am thankful that I have a job and a way to provide for my family. Very thankful. Secondly, I have a choice and an opportunity here. I am going to focus on the positive and not ignore the resistance I am feeling. The resistance is good and is probably a combination of the job itself , the environment and the adjustment period to get comfortable at a new job. 

Noticing and being aware of my feelings are so important. I don't want to ignore it. I do want to give it time and see if anything changes. I keep reminding myself that it has just been 2 weeks and I need to be gentle with myself. I can't ignore the feelings but giving it time to really see what it is that I am really feeling is important. I do know that the telecommute is a big issue for me. 

For now, I am still looking out. I really don't want to just get settled here. Doing the work is one thing but when there is no excitement or motivation, then it becomes an entirely different game. I don't want to stay just because it may be convenient. I need to feel excited. Can I create my own excitement? Yes I can in other things that I do outside of work, however, I can't change my job description and responsibilities. They are what they are. 

I also do know that there will be other opportunities within the company that I can move to eventually so it is not the end of the world. I have just come to realize that I get to chose what I want to do and if this does not work out then there is always another opportunity. There is no need for me to feel that much resistance and I can choose to move whenever I want. Its my life after all and I am the author if it. I get to create my next opportunity where I can feel excited and motivated. 

I am so very grateful though for the place that I am in. I get a paycheck, I woke up today and I am still breathing. The rest is figureoutable. 

Wish you peace and love,

Peace

Monita

LAST COUPLE OF DAYS

So just a couple of days left till I start my new job. I am starting to feel more excited than nervous. Maybe that's how I feel right now. The one thing that I started thinking about was how I was going to show up for my job. 

I am not sure where I am going with this so I hope it will make sense as I continue to write. Of course, I have my best outfit for the first day of work and plan to get my nails done etc. So looking good and dressing like a professional is all set.

I was thinking about how I am going to really put my best foot in right from the first day. I really want to succeed in this role. I don't know what that measure of success would look like but I guess if they have not fired me in 90 days, then at least,  I have passed the first stage. I have this awesome opportunity to start at a new job and I want to start on the right foot and make sure it lasts for as long as I am employed there. 

So what is my plan. The plan will evolve once I start and get to learn what my new role will entail. I do know that my goal is to do the best work that I have ever done in the last 14 years. I want to master my responsibilities and go above and beyond whats required and to keep learning new things.

So why is this so important and doesn't everyone do that anyway. Well, yes we all( I hope) go into a job, doesn't matter if it is old or new, and do our work. When you love what you do, that makes it easier and time flies. You always put your best in and it does not feel like work. When you do something as a means to an end and think of it as just a job to pay the bills, it requires a little more motivation, or when you have been there for so long that you get comfortable and are no longer feeling the push or excitement. It becomes another day at work. 

The choice is to go in and say, well this is going to help pay my bills so I am going to do what I need to and leave at the end of the day without much thought. My goal here is to go in and do what I have to do as part of the job, but not to let the feeling of its a means to an end get to me that I stop doing my best.

I hope that my next job is the best job I have ever had. And why not make it that way everyday even if I am there 3 years , 5 years or 10 years. We will have days where we are tired and feeling down but I still want to do my very best every single day and push through the feeling of getting too comfortable. 

I hope that this job will help me transition into something else that I really love doing. I don't want to go in and think about that transition now. I want to go in and work as if this is what I love doing. We all have our reasons for doing what we do or taking the job that we need to. There is always a reason. But I am planning out for my life and this is part of that plan. This is a way to get me to transition at some point down the road maybe in the same area or another.

Whether it is going to work, or being a stay home parent, your own boss etc, no matter what it is that you are doing, do the very best that you can every single day so when you go to sleep at night, you can feel proud of yourself. It also leads to less regrets down the line since you know you did your best.

In this particular instance, I am starting a new role with a different company. So for me, its a chance to set my goals from the very start and to really think about what I want to get out this role. When I do leave the company, I don't want it to seem like I just mastered my responsibilities but was stagnant in acquiring other skills that could have been useful. So getting the experience and being exposed to a variety of other things, other than my responsibility, for me would be considered doing my best work there.

I don't have a plan laid out and probably won't till a few months for now, but once I do, I can really focus on what skills do I want to gain while being employed here. The company has a lot of resources and why not use them. Why not make use of what they have and offer. I mean really.

I did not do that while I was at my prior job cause I got real comfortable. I do not want that to happen here. Who knows, maybe one day I might get laid off so while I am there, I need to use the job to further myself and how do I do that? By my doing my best work and constantly reminding myself of the plan.

So for those of you out there that are starting a new job, I do wish you all the best. Get in there and really lay out a plan for yourself. Take the time to know people in other departments, don't be afraid to say hi to whoever is passing by or if you are in the cafeteria or copy room. Make that first move and find out what others are doing. Learn more about them. Find out all the free resources that the company offers and make full use of it. Your time there maybe limited so make the most of it. Get comfortable but not too comfortable. Keep planning and re-planning. 

I am ready and the time is just right. I know that it will be great and I will keep posting how things go. 

Wish you Peace and Love!

Peace,

Monita

STARTING MY NEW JOB SOON

Hello my friends!! Happy Monday! Well, I finally got the email that I am starting my new job in 2 weeks. My first thought was oh no vacation over and then yippee, I am finally going to be getting a paycheck. 

I have been off since the summer being at home with the kids and since they have been at school, really enjoying being at home and using the time to myself. Now, the count down to my first day at my new job has begun. I am having mixed feeling of happiness and nervousness at the same time.

I am also trying to fit in all the things that I want to do between now and the next few days. Firstly, taking care of my overall health is really important so exercising everyday is on the front. Secondly, getting my quiet time by either going for a walk and practicing to be fully present. Thirdly, reading as much as I can during the day. Fourthly, watching HGTV and food network and lastly soaking up the sun every single second that I can.

I know that once I start my new job, I will have very limited time to myself. Working all day, coming home to be the kids, making dinner etc will leave me with no time. So I am purposely really trying to fill my mornings now with all the things I want to do for myself.

My kids know that I am going back soon and they understand...I hope. I have had such a great time being home and able to to drop them to the bus and pick them up. Now, my husband will be in charge of drop off and pick up. I will certainly miss the days but I know that when I feel down, all I will have to do is remember the smile on their face and our many wonderful moments together.

I loved being home with them and experiencing camp mom. I will say that I am so grateful that I had the opportunity too. It was the best summer and time went by so quickly. Now, its back to the work grind for me.

I am starting a new job after 15 years and the thought of walking in to my new work place gives me the jitters. I am nervous but I know that it was pass in the first couple of months on the job. I just need to get through the first couple of months. So what will that entail. Lots of self care and love!!!

I have had a nice long break and am not sure how to feel going back to work. Some days I feel excited about it and other days I feel overwhelmed at the thought of walking into an office and sitting in front of the computer for over 8 hours a days! Yikes, how am I going to sit in front of a computer all day!! I have got so used to walking around home and being more active then I ever have been. 

For me, finding a way to keep active while at work is going to be a lot harder. There is no good walking path nearby the office and I know that since everything is going to be a fresh start, I will be sitting more on my desk than I'd like to while learning the new job, meeting people and figuring things out. All the things anyone would need to do right when starting a new job. But why does it seem so difficult..or am I making it harder then it really needs to be?

I always need to question myself. I know that there is not much that I can do about the fact that I am going to be in front of the computer long hours during the day. The only thing I can do is to make sure that I get up and walk around as much as possible and that I keep up with my exercising. Okay that feels good to write out. 

Now, how about the new job itself. Well, its going to be good to learn new things. I am a learner and I love learning, but this job itself does not seem to excite me that much. I have to work to pay the bills so it is a means to an end. It is a job, not a vocation. 

Keeping the purpose in mind here is going to be really crucial to help me get through the first few months. I have to keep reminding myself as to why I really have to do this. This also maybe one of the times where I have to listen to Amy Cuddy's ted talk and to really hound in on how I can fake it till I make it. 

That's it friends. Fake it till you make it!!! While I actually don't believe in faking things or feelings, starting this new job maybe a good place to really put that in practice. I need to just fake it and hopefully by faking it, I will get to place where I would not be feeling so overwhelmed. 

But, its going to be okay. It's going to be for the best and it will all fall in place. My feelings will go away and who knows, I may actually like the job.  I might even enjoy it. Who knows! The only thing I can do now is to continue my vacation and really enjoying myself. As I say to myself soak it in girl!!!


Wish you peace and love!

Peace,
Monita

REJECTIONS

Hello my friends!!! Ahhh rejections seem to have been the theme in my job hunt over the summer. I applied to well over 60 jobs and more than 90% of them came back as rejections. You know when you get an email and it says something like "thank you for applying, we will not be moving forward with your application", or "thank you for applying, we have decided to move forward with candidates that are more qualified" or "thank you for applying, while your resume is impressive, it unfortunately does not meet our requirements"...  or something along those lines.

Well, at least they say thank you!!! So I realize that this is pretty normal. It is really normal. After all, the HR department receives hundreds of applications so it is not possible to respond to everyone individually. Sending a standard thank you for applying email makes sense. I would do that if I were them as well so I get it.

Nevertheless, getting all those rejections can be a little heartbreaking and nerve wrecking. I was after all not in a job while I was applying so I felt the pinch and anxiety a lot more. I kept thinking if anyone would ever want to hire me or if they say that my resume is impressive then whats wrong. Many a times, I felt like I was not hire-able and no company would ever want me. Those rejections can really make sure feel down.  I felt down a lot of times but somehow knew deep deep down that things will work out. That someone will want to hire me and it will be the right job with the right company. Deep down I felt confident. A rejection after all was just a feeling that I had at that time.

During the initial process of my job hunt, it was hard getting so many rejections at once. I will say that if you feel the rejection pinch, then stay with the feeling. Its okay to feel that way and it is normal. The rejection is not a rejection of you as a person.. the rejection is about the job and the requirements of the job descriptions. YOU as a person are not getting rejected and that was something that I had to keep in mind. This was not about me. They are trying to fill a role and they want the best, most qualified person for the job and that is based on who you know, education, skill set and experience. What others have on their resume may be the exact thing that they are looking for and it has nothing to do with me and you. 

I think a lot of people take rejections, whether it be related to jobs or otherwise, personally. I certainly did. Now when I look back, its easier to think that I should not take it personally but at that time of the job rejection, I really had to remind myself that all the time. I had to say, this is not about who you are. I know that a lot of people go through someone they know to apply for a job so references get a lot of attention. All my referrals were also rejections so it really hit me. 

I feel that if I ever am in the situation of looking for another job opportunity, I know that those rejections will come. I also know that it is okay and very normal and mentally prepare myself for it. One of the things that I helped was to know and accept that you will be rejected. There is no way around that. You will be rejected, maybe not more than 90% of the times in job applications, but it will happen. Great for the few of you out there if you have never experienced a job rejection but for most of us, it is normal. 

So expecting and accepting rejections became the norm for me. After awhile, the rejections will stop stinging. You will stop feeling bad about yourself. Its almost like you need to stop feeling bad and move through those feelings so you can keep moving forward. The rejections are here to help you move forward and to keep applying. For every rejection I got in a day, I applied to more many jobs the next day and the next day. I never gave up. I looked at it and said okay here's another one on the rejection list so whats next. You must look for the next opportunity and keep applying. Keep at it while reminding yourself that the right one will come. 

Its not just applying to jobs and getting the rejection email, but also getting rejected after an interview. That happened to me as well, again very normal. So you go for an interview and it seems like they really liked you (and they probably did) and then once again you get the standard email from the HR system saying, "we are sorry but you have not been selected". Yes ouch I know. 

It hurts!!! There is no denying that. Just when you think okay now the call will come and I will get offered a position, bam  you get the email. When that happened to me, I let myself be down. I allowed myself to feel the sadness. I knew that there was a very strong chance that it would happen and it did. I felt really sorry and also thought, well it was their loss and not mine. I then also realized of how fearful I felt of those rejections. Right from the start, I was scared of the rejections and not getting the approval for the job. I had a real learning opportunity. There was nothing to be afraid of. 

Thinking of rejections as it was not my loss but the company's, really helped me take on a different perspective. If you get rejected for a promotion, a salary raise, by someone, a lover etc, it is not your loss and it probably is the best thing for you. Keep your self-confidence. I have become a firm believer that everything happens FOR you and for whats best for you, always. I am going to add that to my daily mantra list and will find a way to remember it. 

Here's the thing my friends, rejections are a part of life. Don't be afraid of them.  How you handle those reactions is always a choice that you have. You can learn from it, grow from it and move on from it. You can feel the rejection sting, but how you choose to clean up that sting wound is your choice. I will choose to find a way to let it heal and to help with that, work on my next action steps all the while remembering that it is the best thing that can happen to me. Cause it is...

Wish you well my friends!!!


Peace

Monita

PAUSED

Hello My friends! Wow, it has been been 7 months since I last wrote on my blog. That is a long pause. I had been thinking about it and quite honestly it fell on the wayside since I was focused on so many other things. So here is why my pause was so long.

Well, I finally quit my job back in February. Yippee for me!!! It was the best decision ever. I am so happy that I took that difficult step. It was really hard to be without a steady paycheck for so many months but I have no regrets. I have grown so much and it was all worth it. Not saying it was easy but I knew that staying at my job another day would not be an option. I could not walk in there and do my work anymore. I really like my team members and got along with every one of them. We have a good friendship and I miss them dearly but I knew that I needed to quit and I am so glad that I did something about my uneasiness and thought about myself for a change.

I enrolled at George Mason University for the Leadership Coaching for Organizational Well Being Accredited program that started in February and ended in June. I worked part time in between and that was great. I ended up leaving the part time job in June and took the summer off to be with my kids for the summer. It was the best summer ever. I loved being a stay home mom and enjoyed spending time with them. We also had family come visit which was fun and the kids had a lot of fun spending time with their cousins. I love camp mom!!!

So now the kids are back in school and I recently accepted a job offer. I am going back to work full time. I need to go back and hope that my next job will different then the last one. I also do not plan on staying there another 14 years but I feel a lot more clear headed now and know that I have a choice.

When I think about the long pause I have had in writing, it does make me feel sad. I love to write and wish I could take back the time to write. But, I am back now and ready to write. I don't necessarily have an agenda and that is okay. I am not sure how often I will write but it will certainly not be 8 months from now. That's for sure.

The pause was not a stop. It was a break to allow me to really focus on getting my certification and to spend time with family. Don't we all need to pause every now and then? Yes, we do and it will be different for everyone.  My pause in writing was long but now as I look back and reflect I think it was necessary. I know that I will always have my writing and that will stay with me forever and I can now spend more time and focus on it. While I was doing my certification, I did have the time but I spent it on what I needed most then. Could I have used my time better? For sure, but I did what I needed to do. 

I realize that while I can spend a lot of time beating myself up for not writing all these months or I can get over it and focus on what I want to do now. I choose the latter. Now,  I am at a different place and I feel differently from the inside. I experienced so much growth just from the last few months and am so truly grateful for the experience. I am just so thankful for the time I had to myself and for my family. The time that passed and the long pause I had in my writing and my job will likely never come again soon. This is one of the most memorable years ever!!! Giving birth to my kids is the most memorable...

So here we are on the start of a long holiday weekend. The kids are back in school and I can feel the weather changing. I can feel the change not only in the air but in my life and the upcoming weeks. The pause has made me more self aware. For a long time, especially after I left my job, I felt a bit lost and now I feel a lot more clear headed. A feel a shift within myself and the pause has allowed me to grow within.

So it has been a good thing. It was much needed and I can now look at things a little differently. If anyone of you have ever experienced an intentional pause, I hope you too have the chance to reflect that time and think about what a difference it has made in your life.

Wish you well my friends!

Peace,

Monita

THINK BIG

I stopped at my favorite bagel place on my way in to work and ordered my usual,long island sandwich (bagel with lox and cream cheese). As I was checking out, I read the quote on the board and it made me stop. I read it a couple of times and took a picture of it so I would always have it with me.

Isn't it so true though.Life is too short and we need to think big. I really need to work on not listening to people who say it can't be done. I am a strong believer that if you believe you can do it, then it can be done. We have to learn to tune out the voices that people say and, more importantly, what we say to ourselves.

What we say to ourselves matters every single second of the day. If you are telling yourself not to think big, you can't accomplish what you want, stop dreaming, its not possible or any thoughts that are negative, then your life and choices that you make will be on those believes.

We all have our doubts for sure and that helps to get a good overall perspective on things. But we need to think big and dream big. What's stopping us? I love the dream big movie which actually inspired a movement to help kids become innovators to improve the lives of other people. When you get a chance, do watch it. 

For me when I think big and dream big, I look inwards and it helps. Thinking big will hopefully fuel your creative side as well and come up with innovative ideas. Life is truly short and our time is limited. I want to think big and dream dream and will not let myself or others tell me that it can't be done. 

How may times if you heard successful people say that in you have to dream big and not to listen to the naysayers. There will always be those out there but to pursue your plans and dreams you have to get past it and you have to push through.

If we think small, we live a life that it not our optimum. I am not sure about you but I really want to optimize my life. I feel that up until now, I have been thinking small and not allowing my full self to dream and think big and also listening to others more than listening to myself and believing in myself.

That's what the new year and new self brings for me. More of whats in my heart and allowing my heart to think big. Its day dreaming and allowing myself to picture and think and visualize of all the big things I want to accomplish in my life. Its moving all the voices and naysayers out of my life and pushing them aside to allow room for the big things to come through.

Our mind just never stops does wandering and thinking so the question to ask yourself is: what thoughts are you going to allow in your mind? I, for one, am not going to waste my time thinking on the small talk and on people that just try to out my ideas down. No...I am going to train my mind to think big. 

This is one of those things that just does not happen automatically. You mind will just not switch just because you say so. You need to make it a conscious habit and notice your mind and the thoughts that are you thinking. Now when I wake up every day I have to train myself and repeat to myself the quote above so I can set up my day.

The point to keep reminding yourself of thinking big and being very careful of the thoughts you say to yourself or that others say to you. I know that from now on, not only will I need to repeat the quote to myself, but I will also support my friend or who ever I come across to think big. 

We all need each other and this is one of the ways we can all support each other to always think big, dream big and know that you can accomplish big things!

I love this quote by Vanilla Ice:

 “Listen, if you don’t talk big game, you never get anywhere. If you don’t think big, you don’t get big".

So what will your thoughts be today? I know what mine will be.

Wish you love my friends!

Peace,

Monita 

HAPPY 2019

Wishing you all a very Happy New Year my friends!!! Another year has gone and a new one just begun. All the dreams and wishes and resolutions that were maybe left unfulfilled last year will hopefully come true this year and so much more.

I am very optimistic about 2019. This is going to be a year of change for me. I know that there is at least one big change that I am going to make in my life and the change is a necessity to put me on the track of the life that I want to live. It won't be easy. A year of change will require me to a lot from me and will be challenging.

As I gear up towards making the change, one of the biggest block for me is mental. There are a whole of emotions involved, the biggest being fear. I am not entirely sure how to go about writing about it at this time but will need to sort through it and go through the change and as I do, I will surely share my thoughts.

So what will this year bring for you? Have you thought about all your resolutions or made a list of all your goals? How are you going to go about accomplishing them? Do you have a plan? Every goal needs a plan. Don't let your goals just remain goals. We all need actionable steps towards making them happen. 

A lot of people don't keep their resolutions. I have certainly struggled with this a lot in the past years. We get excited during the holidays and start to think about the next year. We make a list of resolutions that we intend to keep and start the new year strong. We keep up for a few months, then somehow we find ourselves at year end again wondering whatever happened to last year resolutions. This may not be you, but I know this is me and some people. Resolutions are hard to keep so I don't keep them anymore.

I have decided that instead of saying to myself I will loose weight, eat healthier, go the gym at least 5 days a week or practice yoga more regularly I just go day by day. I try to remain as present as I can on what I need to do to keep myself healthy and focus on taking small steps every day. I know I love to workout so I make sure I get my exercise in a few days a week. I am not setting hard resolutions but for me I know what I need to do and just need to do it. No more excuses.

We all know that loosing weight and getting more exercise is the number one new years resolution for a lot of people. I say you just have to make it happen if that is your resolution and find a way. Stop making excuses for your health. Its not an option. 

My year of change will require me to have a huge dosage of hope and faith and I pray that I do. I know that no matter what the year brings, it will be a great year with lots of learning and growth. My hope is that this year I can bring change, create more connections and make a difference in people's lives. 

I hope all your dreams come true my friends!! I wish all of us the very best for 2019!!!

Now lets begin!

Wishing you love,

Peace,

Monita